The Morning After

LOVHello little baby.

Name: Lake Odin VanLaanen
Birthday: 5/29/16 @ 1709
Height and weight: 20 inches, 7lb and 3.4oz

“My thoughts are this: I might just edit this away, but for now: a lot of people talk about how miraculous birth is. I would not have chosen the experience myself, however, being hellbent on not having a surgical delivery, and being he seemed like he was getting pretty big to stay inside, really only left me with the one option. Keep going and push him out, strange as that was.”

“I feel broken in half and like I’ve been run over by a truck. Makes it hard to enjoy the wonder of being a new mother in the way I imagined where you can totally focus on the baby. In contrast, it was so easy to cuddle with him when he was in utero and I was all healthy. But here we are: we made it to the present moment: he’s born, and I’m recovering. He’s sleeping on my chest and the sun’s filtering through the blinds. The pediatrician just came in and said that he has time to figure everything out, just like I do.”

“We are blessed. We had an amazing birth team. Every single person contributed to the success of the birthday, and although I was continually filled with self-doubt, and wishing that I could do better during the birth process, the overwhelming feedback that was so encouraging was that I was doing a very good job and really strong (this is true, she was amazing -ed).”

“I want to say something about my husband. Who stayed with me during the entire three day birthathon. He was present and centered with me, calm, supportive and glowing with love. When I was struggling, I could look into his eyes and he would be looking at me in all those ways, and coach me: to breathe, and believe in myself. Because he was believing in me.”

2 thoughts on “The Morning After

  1. Dear dear new parents, Tolle and Michael,
    Much love to you and congratulations on coming through your birthathon very well.
    Children are such wonderful teachers for us in sooo many different ways. Thank you for the blog ☺️ Gotta go, but I’ll be checking back frequently! (It is really good to put your thoughts/feelings down asap, cause so much will be happening and changing so quickly with Lake Odin and you both!) XOX

    Like

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